Saturday, March 19, 2011
Why does everyone expect me to be their perfect somebody?
I'm not perfect,seriously.
I do cry, I do feel pain.
I have my own problems too.
I shouldn't have treated everybody so well. What do I get at the end of the day?
People get frustrated at me, people say i don't compromise, people say i'm not the serene they know anymore.
Its true, I don't know who I am anymore. Am I that Serene? The forever happy-looking one?
I'm sick of accommodating to everybody's like. Why must I be the one who call or plan anything first? I can't even manage the problems I have in my family.
Everybody's unhappy about me.
This is not what I want too. and I think I'm not longer that important too cause there's somebody else more important at your side. I come to realized I need you guys more that you guys need me.
FAMILY.
What is it? Father, mother, children?
I don't know anymore. I'm sick of all the quarrels, sick of all the lies, sick of all the hypocritical. Who are you exactly? Are you still my dad? Why are you like this?
We feel pain too;
You make us feel that we are just the burden to your life. You almost kill us, omg.
Death is not scary, you are. I'm scared. I don't want you to hurt us.
Too painful, I really hope there'll be someone whom I can rely on when I'm out of breathe. But there ain't somebody. SAD.
I finally quit my job after tolerating almost 1 year. That's something to be happy about. After all this time, I saved none. What's the point of hanging on when I don't see the money coming in? Yeah money, money is FUCKING important.
I hope time can freeze during that moments.
[11:15 PM]